SLOW: Self Love Rituals

 Photo by  @ericrankinshoots  

WHY HELLO THERE.

My name is Cady and I am the host here at CADY MADE. Welcome to my very first blog post.

My original plan was to launch this website on my birthday, but going with the flow of things (which is my theme this year) I had to postpone. And that is okay! In this first post I am going to walk you through Day 1 of my 24th year and offer an idea about how I celebrate myself on my birthday. I like to think about my birthday as my own personal "New Year" which is important to me for setting intentions for the year ahead. But this can be done any day of the year. 

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February 14th, 2018 was my 24th birthday. Also known as Valentine's Day, a day for celebrating those you love. Because my birthday is on Valentine's Day, I have never fully felt like I had a day to celebrate myself when everyone is celebrating everyone else. Call it selfish, but I like to celebrate me on my birthday. I get a lot of shit done in a year and I think that is worthy of some acknowledgement. If I don't take time to celebrate the things I do, then what was it really for?

Go get a pen and a piece of paper. It's time for you to celebrate you.

I want you to take a moment and celebrate something you have accomplished in the last year. Think about something that you put your heart and soul into and that truly made you feel good. Now write it down. Write everything that you have done in the last year that you think is worthy of celebration. Brain dump. Now look at that list and congratulate yourself! You are awesome!

This is not selfish. Yes, it is important to celebrate your relationships with others, but if you give and give and don't take time to thank yourself for the hard work you are doing it can get exhausting. So while celebrating everyone else, don't forget to celebrate yourself. 

GO LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND TELL YOURSELF YOU LOVE YOU.

For real, get up off your bottom and go do it. Tell yourself that you are awesome because you are awesome. 

February 14th is my day of awesome. Over the years my ritual has grown and changed and it will continue to grown and change. But every year I continue to make sure I celebrate myself on February 14th and I don't let anything else change that. So pick a day in your calendar and schedule in some "me time". Write down "DAY OF SELF LOVE" and don't let anything change those plans. Start thinking about all the things you like to do for you and write them down. This year, my day of self love had a little help from my boyfriend and my friends which is totally cool. The rules are not concrete as long as you are not compromising your day of happiness. 

So you have a list.

On your piece of paper you will have a list of everything awesome that you did in the last year. You will also have a list of everything that you want to do for you for your upcoming Day of Self Love. Star everything on that list that is important to you and your well-being. Now take a new piece of paper and your favourite pens. Write in big bold letters "DAY OF SELF LOVE". Write down the date of the day you chose on the piece of paper. Circle it. Now write down, draw pictures, or both on the poster of all the important things that are starred on your list. Colour the poster. Put some glitter on it. Now pick a place in your room, your bathroom, your kitchen, or anywhere that you go tend to spend the most time and hang it in a place on display. Relish in that poster. Add ideas to it. When you get to your Day of Self Love, take that poster down and do all the things that you want to do. Check off each item as you do them. If you run out of time that day and don't get to do it all, no worries. Put those things that didn't get done on the next poster for the next Day of Self Love. Maybe it's been a hard year and you need 2 days. So be it. Do what you need to do to make sure that you feel loved. Make it your own tradition, your own celebration, your own ritual. 

My day of Self Love. 

5:30 am: Wake up and make a large cup of black coffee. I love getting up early and I love a hot cup of black coffee in the morning. I plugged into my favourite radio show, and then made myself some pancakes and strawberries for breakfast. 

6:00 am: I gathered the cards and gifts that had been mailed to me by my friends and family. As the sun rose from the black skyline through my kitchen windows, I read the words of love that others had decided to share with me. 

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7:30 am: Put the finishing touches together for my makeup. Electric blue eyeliner called Freedom (very fitting for the day) from Elate Cosmetics, bright pink creme blush called Love (also fitting for the day) also from Elate Cosmetics, and a glitter stick highlight from Milk Makeup. I am obsessed with glitter, and bright blue eyeliner, and wearing the colour pink. On this day I wear what I want! I also chose to wear my favourite pink gingham top that I made myself. It feels good to wear things I make myself. 

8:00 - 9:30 am: I work on this website!

10:00 am: Tea and treats with my lovely friend at the White Heather Tea Room. It was absolutely delicious and they gave me a piece of cake with a candle to wish on. I love going for tea because it is a 90 minute seating where I can enjoy my time at a leisurely pace. Nibble, sip, talk, nibble. 

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11:30 am: I stop at a fabric store on the bus route home to buy a few things with the birthday money my Granny gave me. Two zippers for a future matching set, some lingerie elastic, and a lovely piece of fabric. Fabric stores make me deliriously happy and I don't know anyone who enjoys them as much as I do. 

12:30 pm: Make another cup of tea, take a seat at my favourite spot at my kitchen counter, and nibble on the leftover treats from this morning. There were so many that we didn't even get to the dessert plate so it had to be packed up to take home. I also pull out my tarot cards and my oracle deck. I draw a card "Desert Harvest" from my Wild Kuan Yin oracle deck. The card is all about allowing for abundance through unconventional means and trusting in the Divine Mother that she will provide. I also do a tarot spread for the year ahead. I like to use the Celtic Cross format for my year ahead readings. The questions I asked were largely around "What do I need to know about the year ahead in order to grow and bring well-being to me?". The cards told me to stop being so neurotic, to trust in myself, and that the universe is with me. The only thing stopping me in my path would be me. Quite fitting with the oracle card I drew. Sometimes I like to cross reference between my decks to get a proper feeling about things. The last few years I have started working with crystals as well. I have a few bracelets from Shanti Collective that I wear everyday. The Self Love bracelet with rose quartz, cherry quartz, and pearl, and a Sandalwood + Stone stacking bracelet from the Adventurer archetype which is labradorite. Feeling into the new year I stumbled across a Sandalwood + Stone stacking bracelet in Moonstone which I have now added to my wrist. The moonstone bracelet is from the Seeker archetype and has completed my triad of personal archetypes: Lover, Adventurer, and Seeker. Moonstone is also symbolic of new beginnings, reminding us that everything is cyclical, and abundance. After all of these overlapping themes, I have distilled them into a mantra for the year: 

For the year of 24 I am letting go of control and anxiety, I am allowing abundance and well-being into my life, and I am trusting in the universe that it will all be achieved. 

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2:00 pm: Take a break to set up my new batch of kombucha and to listen to a podcast about rituals on The Numinous Podcast. 

3:00 pm: Back to working on my website!

5:30 pm: Realize that I should be leaving at this time to catch a bus downtown to my boyfriend's apartment, slightly freak out, and then rush to pack up my things. He tells me to not stress out (I can get anxious fairly easily when I feel like I am disappointing someone) and take my time. 

6:45 pm: Arrive at my boyfriend's apartment. He lets me up and I walk through his door to find the whole apartment lit with candles. My favourite French music is floating through the air. He hands me a glass of red wine and makes me dinner while I enjoy some bread with balsamic vinegar and olive oil. My boyfriend knows me very well. Throughout the night he continues to surprise me. He pulls out a handmade cake from the fridge (the first cake he has ever made) and it is the sweetest thing to end a lovely night. 

My day of self love was indulgent, but also relaxing. I had time to myself, and time with others who I love. I was able to plan out some goals and intentions for the year ahead, and accomplish some tasks that I really wanted to get done. It was a day where I did the things that I wanted to do, and didn't sacrifice anything for them to happen. For myself, those days are the most restorative. Throughout the year when I am feeling like I need it, I take a day to myself where I do what I want and don't sacrifice my plans for anyone else. And that is okay. That is self love in my eyes. 

Here is to self love and recognizing that you are awesome. I hope you enjoy your Day of Self Love as much as I enjoyed mine. 

xx Cady